Kentucky Derby – Janeka?

800

The invitation

My friend Ratish stays in Louisville, Kentucky. Nothing happens there – it’s a one horse town.

On 2^nd May, 2001, he calls me. “Dude, the Kentucky Derby is on 6^th May. Aaja, Mazaa aaega“. 

“What’s a Kentucky Derby?” I ask.

“What?!? Are you kidding me?! Kentucky Derby is a Horse race.” demystifies Ratish.

“Horse Race… Me? No No. I can’t yaar. Last I sat on a horse was 10 years ago in Matheran. The trainer was in complete control of the horse. And yet, I managed to fall – thrice. Even the horse laughed at me. Sorry, but I can’t participate in horse race at the Kentucky Derby.”

Silence.

My horse sense, “Jitu, chup. wait. Don’t talk”.

Ratish barked: “Just because you wear a jockey under your pants, doesn’t make you a Jockey. I am inviting you to W.A.T.C.H the horse race”.  Yeda!

“Oh.. I see. Accha, OK.

Pause.

“But, why would anyone want to watch the animals running in a circle?“ i inquire.

“Jitu, mere bhai, it’s a big deal. All the rich, famous, and classy people – the Who’s Who of America – including the Hollywood stars come to watch the Kentucky Derby”.

My chest swell in pride. My friend thinks I belong to “rich and classy” category, It felt like I just received a million dollars. 

“You mean I will be sitting and mingling with the Rich and Famous?” I ask excitedly.

Rati explained “There are 3 types of stands – the VVIP stands where the rich and famous sit. Then there are the VIP seats where the almost famous sit. And the rest – general public – stand in the middle of the ground with the racetrack surrounding.

Pause.

We will be on the ground. It provides a great view of the VIP stands. “

My chest deflated. It felt like someone just robbed my million dollars.

He gave me few more ridiculous reasons.

There will be lot of people (what!? Last thing I want is lot of people. I am from Mumbai), It’s a fashion event with both men and women wearing extraordinary hats, Lots of food – the chicken buckets, Ham burgers. You can eat like a horse.  (He very well knows I am vegetarian).

I decided to go.

Our friend Kumar (SK) stays in California. “SK, do you want to join us for the Kentucky Derby?” i ask.

“Wait a minute, it means I have to leave early from work on Friday, fly down 5 hours, and drive 6 hours to Kentucky and do the same things on my way back… Aaaall of this for what?! – to watch the animals run in circle for ~ 100 seconds and street food?! Are you mad or what?!?

Ofcourse, 100% aaega.” He said excitedly

The Drive – Atlanta to Kentucky

Friday night, SK, Priya and I started driving from Atlanta to Kentucky.

SK is a happy man. He is not married. Also, among his married friends, he doesn’t seem to appreciate peace between husband and the wife. He always ignites a controversial topic, sits back, and enjoys the show – the couples debating to begin with, then arguing, then fighting and don’t-talk-to-me silence! And during these intense debates, SK always is never in our (men’s) team, he is always in the wives’ camp. And that’s unfair because he knows a lot of our little secrets.

True to his nature he started “If both husband and wife are working professionals, I think the household chores should be equally distributed. What do you think, Priya?”

At the end of 2-hour conversation, Priya and I ended up fighting. Priya and SK concluded that henceforth I will be responsible for laundry including folding of the clothes (not haphazardly, it should be perfectly aligned and neatly kept in the right drawers), cleaning of the toilets and bathrooms including all the corners and Garbage dispensing – daily!  SK even volunteered for a weekly review call on these tasks. WTF!

Now, in the car, 2 were smiling and 1 was grumpy!

We reached Nashville; I ask SK “can you open the map and let me know the directions”. There is no map in the car (remember this is 2001 – no Google Maps)

I decide to call Ratish. Given that it was a Friday night, I was sure he would be fully awake. My phone was connected to the car speaker.

Me (in little worried tone): Hi Ratish.

Ratish (loud with full energy): Jitu Bhai.. Bol

We could smell the old monk through my phone.

Me: Ratish, I’m near Nashville on I-65 … yahan se tera ghar KAISA AANEKA?

Ratish (with a slight pause): Arey BINDAAS AANEKA!

SK and Priya burst laughing.

“WTF! Its 2 am for heaven’s sake” I say,

“Mazaak mat kar yaar… tell me KAISA aane ka?”

Ratish (this time he joined my co-passengers laughter): Bola na… Bindaas aaneka !

After couple of more attempts, I gave up. SK and Rati started discussing who is better – Messi or Ronaldo.

That night I learnt an important life lesson: for directions, carry a map.

Finally, somehow, we reach Kentucky.

The Derby Day !

6^th May 2001 – it’s a bright and sunny day in Kentucky. We have a freshly brewed coffee. And we are pumped thinking about the exciting day.

I open my email from Kentucky Derby Admin to download my ticket. I click on the Download Ticket button. And nothing happens. I wait. Nothing. No sign of download. I try few more times. My computer is now hung. And then computer says “You downloaded a malicious file. You have been attacked by a virus. Your file is corrupt now. “My Kentucky Derby tickets – corrupt?!?” 

And then the name of virus appears on the screen – “Trojan Horse”. Can you believe it? This bloody Horse virus is attacked the event that made the horse kingdom famous! Ridiculous. I am back on laptop and press all the irrelevant buttons. That’s a sign that brain has stopped working.  Unable to disguise his glee for full 3 minutes, Ratish came to me and said “Jitu, hold your horses. Chill… Don’t worry, I have a hard copy”.

Phew!

We reach the venue – the Churchill downs Racetrack – and it was packed. 1.55 lac people had turned up to watch the galloping horses. It was a crazy atmosphere. People were dressed stylishly. Both men and women wore most outrageous, over the top hats. There was energy and hope in people’s voice. Absolutely loved it.

A boy in purple shirt said, “I am betting with 1000 dollars on THUNDER BLITZ, and I am going to buy a bike with all that money”. People were putting the cart before the horse by making grand plans on how they will spend the money.

After trying multiple spots, we found a perfect spot for the event. We were close to food counter, the beer counter and had a great view of the VIP stand.

Few big men – really big – were jumping, moving their neck and eyes left to right. Curious to understand what they were upto, I asked “What are you doing?”

“I am warming up.” 

“But, the horses are supposed to run” I tried to bring a smile on this monster man. Instead, I got a stare, a scary stare.

“Look at your size. You cannot be a jockey. The poor horse would get crushed if you sat on it”; Ofcourse I did not say it. I just thought.

“Why are you warming up? “ I asked hesitatingly. And offered him a glass of beer.  

That brought a smile on his face.

He explained “You see, if you just stand here and look in the racetrack direction, there is no chance that you will see a horse, You will miss-the-race. But if you can jump up high enough, you can see the horses. Also, the horses gallop so fast that if you don’t time your vertical jump perfectly, you will miss-the-race. And when you are up the air and if your blink, you will miss-the-race. And you are up in the air and don’t turn your head and eyes to follow the horses in that split second, you will …. “

“Miss-the-race” I complete the sentence.

And he was right. Of the total of 7 races (there is race every one hour), I missed the first 5 races for one reason or the other. And was too tired to jump for the 6^th one.

In between the races, most of us on the ground did the same thing – drink beer, eat food, laugh at the ridiculous hats, and play Guess-the-celebrity-in-the-stands game. Nobody knew who the celebrity was, so we decided majority wins.

For the last race of the day – 1^st of the Triple Crown race – I made the leap of my life, made the perfect neck and eye movement to experience the greatest 2.3 seconds of Horse sport.

The commentator announcing “And down the stretch they come” created goosebumps. Absolutely loved the overall experience of roaring spectators at the venue, atrocious hats, and all the excitement around the galloping horses.

The winning horse gets draped by the roses at the award ceremony. The Jockey gets the medal. Owner of the horse makes over a million dollars.

I still wonder if the horses knew if they were in a race. Were they running for the roses at the end of the race?