The year: 1997.
I landed in the US – my 1st ever trip abroad!
Like most from India (would have been), I was in awe of everything the minute I landed.
Kitnaaa bada airport! What cars! Look at that highway! Ekdam chakachak!
I was totally in awe! The Americans – I pretty much felt I had walked into a Hollywood movie! I loved it.
The next day – early morning at about 8 a.m., I went with my senior, Sanjay, to the campus to complete my admission formalities.
As I walked with him, a girl walked past me and said “Hello”.
I was zapped. Ailla, yeh pehchaantai kya merko?
As we kept walking, a few more people seemed to smile and kept greeting me.
I was confused. I wondered if THEY were confusing ME with someone else!
And Sanjay, as though he immediately read my mind, said “Arey baba, smile kar and say hello…its doesn’t matter if you know them or not. Idhar aisa hi hai!”
(I am still amazed how he read my mind so perfectly!)
I smiled and said OK! Of course, in my mind I was thinking “Bombay mein kisi ladki ko aise ‘Hi’ bola to pakka thappad khaaega!”
But I was not in Bombay! I was in Clemson, so I too started smiling and greeting pretty much everyone.
It was noon by the time I completed the admission formalities.
(Thank God Sanjay was with me, it did help in moving things faster.)
Me to Sanjay: “Yaar, I am hungry. Solid bhookh lag raha hai. Can I get something vegetarian to eat?”
Sanjay: “Hai na Subway, you will get vegetarian food there.”
Subway? Matlab underground? Tunnel? I thought to myself
(Although India had a few of the international food chains coming up in 90’s, yeh Subway nahi aaya tha tabhi.)
And then Sanjay showed me the way to get to Subway. Being the first time that I had even heard about this place, I had no clue what to expect there!
Sanjay went to his class and I was now on my own.
Yes, on my own, a bit nervous. Its just the first day in America. I was nervous mainly because I was finding it difficult to understand the American accent.
[Confession: Even while watching English movies it was the subtitles that helped the most!
Kaash idhar life mein bhi subtitles hota!]
Ok…Back to the story.
I entered Subway and joined the short line. I was a bit edgy.
The place was busy. A few people sitting around, eating, drinking stuff.
As my turn came, I looked at the girl behind the counter.
Her name was Rachel (I read the name tag).
Fattke, I told her I want a Veg Sandwich.
She smiled at me and said ” Sure. Half or footlong”.
Ailla, yeh kya hai abb. I had no clue what is half and what is footlong!
I looked around not knowing what to say (as though trying to look for escape routes!)
She asked me again politely “6-inch or 12 inch”.
Me (nervously): 6 inch.
Rachel: Ok. White or Wheat?
Again??? Again a choice? What is white? What is wheat?
I again looked here and there – hoping for some Indian in the shop. Can you believe my luck – No Indian in this Subway!
Rachel again patiently: “Sir, Which bread would you like to have? White or wheat?”
I had only heard of Wibs and Britannia bread! Dono white hi tha!
Me (again nervously): White
Rachel: “Ok. American, Cheddar or Swiss?”
WTF! Choices again! I was absolutely clueless about what she was asking!
Again, I was silent. Because I had no words to say!
Rachel (who by now was her losing patience) : “Sir, which cheese? American, Cheddar or Swiss?’
I have known and had only Amul cheese all my life until now!
I hated this “multiple option” for every item. Bhookh lagrai yaar, just give me a sandwich! Ek simple sa veg sandwich!
But then, I was stuck here answering this multiple-choice question with no clue about the options I was being presented with! Even if I chose any, I don’t what I am going to get! Oh man! Kaisa lafda hai yeh!
Then I decided I will stop thinking and just pick the 1st choice given!
Me (now confidently): American.
Rachel (even she was worried now): “What veggies do you want?”
I pointed at the few veggies displayed there and she started preparing it.
There was couple more rounds of Q and A – sauces, spices etc… you know about it
(It it felt like an exam.)
Rachel: “That’s it?”
Me (relieved that the ordeal ends, responding with a smile): Yes. (phew)
Rachel: “Hyertugoh”.
I didn’t even bother responding to that question. I thought this was not for me!
Rachel (very slowly): “Sir, here to go?”
Now I was really really tensed. I was almost sweating. Bol kya rahi hai yeh???
I looked around, saw the person behind me getting impatient, and then looked back at her.
Rachel: “Sir Heeere ooorr to Gooo???”
Me… looking at her: “I will eat here and then go!”
She was shocked and looked at me in disbelief!
And all the students standing in the line burst out laughing!
Rachel couldn’t control and she started laughing too!
One guy patted on my back and said… You are the man!
Hahahahah. The heavy heavy moment somehow melted away into that laughter!
This replays in mind every time I walk into a Subway. Even to this day!
i love Subway !
1 comment
Lol 😆 as usual hilarious!